I tend to be the sole person not crying at a funeral. And I’ve taken heat for it.
“Kathy, don’t you feel anything?”
“Why aren’t you crying?”
“Did she not matter to you?”
I’m always shocked how people judge each other’s grieving process. But here’s the thing.
I deal with death nearly every day of my life. These beautiful cadaveric donors lived their lives, giving back after death to help we doctors get educated on how to help people live.
When I see death, I see this selfless, beautiful experience that is only endured alone. I see opportunity to live on in the education of others.
I know that energy never dies but simply changes form. That energy lives on in everyone, in everything, long after we are gone.
When I think of death, I think of enormous gratitude for my life. And every day, all day, I can honestly state I am proud of how I am living it.
So no, I most likely won’t be crying at your funeral. I might be deemed the “bad guy” for it. But, I will be celebrating your life long after you are gone.
And if I’ve known you, I promise you I’ve learned from you. I was listening. I was paying attention.
Before you judge, I hope all the crying folks can say the same.
– Dr. Kathy Dooley