I am a child of integrity, discipline and love.
I am the child of a 45-year marriage.
Including my parents, people ask me – seemingly – every day:
“Dooley, why don’t you get married?”
I’ve nearly been married three times. But when push came to shove, the relationship didn’t have the materials of a solid marriage.
I’ve watched a solid marriage for my nearly 35 years on this planet. I know what it takes. With a divorce rate over 50%, I’d assume most do not.
For those who’ve missed the honor of watching a successful marriage, it isn’t rainbows and bliss. It’s tough and beautiful, rugged and lovely.
It’s this photo.
When my mother met my father, he used to drive so fast he’d leave her in the floorboard. Now, the chemo sees her driving him.
They couldn’t know what “worse” meant when they took those vows. But they made a commitment. And they’ve seen it through children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. They’ve seen it through heart attacks, aneurysms, brain masses, and now – cancer.
When asked about the “worse,” my mom says this:
“We’ve had some amazing times. And we’ve had some rough times, too. But I got married to stay married. He’s my husband.”
In case you need counsel on what those vows mean before taking them, I’m sure Mamacita wouldn’t mind you call her.
Until I find that kind of match, I believe I’ll just stay put and stay my course.
-Dr. Kathy Dooley