Dooley Noted: 2/6/2014
A few days ago, I got kicked in the teeth – on repeat.
Despite my tendency toward optimism, I repeatedly took several shots and dodged several bullets. Some I could have prevented. Others blindsided me.
I kept saying to myself, “What happened while I was away in London?!”
But then I realized the hard truth: what the events all had in common was your author.
I let my worries bully my airway and prevent sleep. I finished a 14-hour workday, just to wake myself from sleep to do more work.
I robbed myself of my recovery, making me feel even worse about the preceding day’s events.
In sympathetic overdrive, I picked up my Starbucks coffee – evidently, for more sympathetic drive.
But the universe always provides exactly what you need.
I dropped my coffee.
As I felt the liquid surround my boots, I watched it stain the snow around me.
And then, the unexpected happened.
I cried.
I cried in the dark morning for my family’s troubles, job worries, school stress, and lack of sleep.
I cried for my personal life, my struggles, my time spent away from friends.
I realized how I couldn’t remember the last time I cried. A movie, perhaps. I don’t do it much in life.
Professional females are widely discouraged from showing emotion. Through my grooming process, I suppose I lost the urge – not that I was ever really decent at using it.
I don’t cry at funerals or weddings. I don’t cry enough when stressed.
But I get the appeal.
To cry is to reach a point of sympathetic (read: fight-or-flight) overdrive so strong that it threatens your airway. The body is so overwhelmed that it forces a parasympathetic (read: rest-or-digest) balancing response, washing tears and forcing a solid, long exhale.
Since we receive our oxygen on the exhale, crying can actually improve gas exchange!
Maybe people need to find a room and cry more.
Maybe it will open their airway.
I felt much calmer after my parasympathetic response. My workday was amazing, and I had a different perspective about the day before.
And I don’t believe it’s habit-forming, so it might be a healthy addition to stress management.
But as always, it’s your call.
– Dr. Kathy Dooley