Dooley Noted: 8/17/2015
I have felt immensely hurt by the truth.
And I have felt the deep, twisted cut of lies.
I had a discussion with my friend this morning about when lies are acceptable.
He had an interesting perspective.
“If the truth makes the person more anxious in the present and has no benefit for the future, then why give the whole truth?”
I understand this concept: the white lies.
The white lies supposedly don’t obscure from the full version of the truth.
The white lies are perceptions of skewed truth, for the benefit of the lie receiver.
But herein lies my issue with the white lies.
Who am I to guess what is best for another person?
Who am I to create myths instead of dispelling them?
And who am I to skew truth to spare future hurt?
I suppose the difference between the white lies and the dark truth is the gray area in between them.
To have white lies makes the gray area that much wider – and the truth that much farther away.
If truth hurts, we must experience it to rebuild and recover.
If lies help, we are under a constant white umbrella, shading us from the truth.
Perhaps truth doesn’t exist but in our perceptions.
This is why eyewitness testimony is so unreliable.
One person’s perception of truth is not like another’s – even if they witness the same event.
We can’t even trust most research, since the testing of hypotheses is often skewed by projected outcomes.
But I can’t help but feel that we should seek as much truth as we can obtain.
I hope you don’t lie and say you are happy, but make steps toward getting there.
I hope you don’t lie and tell me everything’s okay, when talking to me might help you move forward.
And I hope you don’t lie to avoid the darkness that often accompanies the truth.
Perhaps the way to shine light into darkness is to not judge the dark for being dark.
As always, it’s your call.
– Dr. Kathy Dooley
