Dooley Noted: 12/27/2015
Some people have terrible, unthinkable things happen with them – things they never deserved nor welcomed.
These things are not a reflection of their characters.
My nephew and godson is one of these people.
He’s one of the calmest people I’ve ever known – although his parents are quite rambunctious people.
I find myself trying to meet him in his peace.
His girlfriend is sweet and smart, just like him.
While playing rummy with her, I ignited a conversation about how great my nephew turned out, despite the fact he grew up around a very tough environment of drugs, alcohol, and violence.
As the years went by, he was never embarrassed to be hugged by me. He would often initiate, even in his teenage years. He was always all about expressing love and affection. Nothing he went through has hardened his heart.
My nephew is now 21. He is very straight-laced and rarely even drinks.
He is still one of the calmest, most loving people I’ve ever met.
I had asked him earlier in the day how he turned out so well, despite all his hardship in his upbringing.
He said, “Well that’s easy. I did the opposite of what they did.”
I learn so much from him every single time I’m in his atmosphere.
This young man never uses his family of origin as an excuse.
He uses them as motivators.
He could lay down with the Excuse Blanket – and everyone would understand. But he never does and never has. He does his own work to be his own man.
He doesn’t need the Excuse Blanket.
You can use what happens with you as an excuse for your behavior and attitude.
Or, you can do your own work to rise up and shed the Excuse Blanket.
As always, it’s your call.
-Dr. Kathy Dooley
