Dooley Noted: 3/14/2016
When I was young, my mother and father instilled a confidence by example.
Since children mimic their parents, I developed an early habit of self appreciation.
After all, I didn’t know otherwise.
So when I attended school, I started to pick up that I may not be a conformist.
I was unwilling to like things just because that would get me liked.
I wanted to explore, to listen, to learn, to experience.
A non-conformist in a small town is subject to a certain degree of bullying.
No one would be shocked to learn that I wasn’t popular in grade school.
Nor high school.
Nor college.
And I didn’t care nor complain.
I knew myself. I had self love.
After all, if you can’t be true to yourself, with whom in the world can you be honest?
I earned a few solid friends of decades duration.
I earned a career that is like no one else’s.
I had some extremely special romantic relationships.
I wouldn’t have experienced this life as I had if I had succumbed to the bullies.
When you are bullied, you must stay true to yourself.
And you must tear no one down on your path.
Instead, you find people that share your principle set.
You band together to build each other up.
Before you know it, you have an army of trust fueled by your own self-love.
But while you are being challenged by bullies or those pressuring conformity, you can learn some things.
Through the high school years, when I was called a theatre freak, I earned my confidence to speak in front of people.
When I was bullied for my religious choices, I earned confidence in being true to my principle set and beliefs.
And when I could not conform in a relationship, I endured heartbreaks that prepared me to recognize my future husband when I finally met him.
I hope you learn to love and trust yourself all the way.
You can get much done.
Although it may appear that barriers get in your way, it actually removes the barriers so you can see clearly.
And if you are working to get in the way of others, they are only being challenged by you to love themselves more.
You won’t take from them what you want.
Perhaps consider why you are bullying others.
True self-love means you would never try to take it away from someone else.
As always, it’s your call.
– Dr. Kathy Dooley
